4th Grade Purim: Rewriting the ending

(Announcements/upcoming events at the end of this post.)

4th Grade has been enjoying the story of Purim. We were troubled, though, that the end of the story includes Haman getting hanged — and Haman’s kids, too!  Haman’s kids might not have even known about the bad choices that Haman was making at work, they didn’t do anything.  We wrestled with the idea that, historically, Purim is probably a fairytale that Jews told each other when we didn’t have any power, when it was comforting to imagine that we could totally hurt anyone who might want to hurt us.

But, now we DO have power: we have our own country, and we know more things (like that people aren’t bad inside; they sometimes make bad choices). Now that we’re more powerful, we could do something radical: we could rewrite the ending of the story, to be less bloodthirsty and more fair.

Our scholars attempted a Restorative Justice Circle, where instead of immediately having Ahasuarus hang Haman and Haman’s kids, Esther calls a meeting of everyone in Shushan who was impacted by the bad law that Haman was trying to make.  We didn’t quite have time to solve antisemitism in class, but we did go around the circle telling new, fascinating endings that we thought were more fair and/or more helpful to the Jews of Persia.  For example, from 4B: maybe Haman does need to be taken out, for our safety, but perhaps supportive Mordecai can adopt Haman’s kids, and raise them to act right, instead.

Update: Tuesday/Saturday kids got super into acting out our Restorative Justice Circle together. Their endings included Talia’s Vashti returning and secretly being Jewish all along (what a twist!), all the students becoming the new royal advisors instead of Haman, Gracie’s Queen Esther epically demanding more power for women (granted by Isaac’s party-King Ahasuarus, in exchange for more cake), wise and excellent points by Noa’s Mordecai and all the new top advisors.  The teachers’ portrayals of Haman began by not understanding what the big deal was, but our Hamans eventually became contrite when all these advisors spoke about the impact of Haman’s bad choices.  Haman has now been summarily fired from his position of power, he has to do lots of community service for the Jews, attend court-mandated therapy to help him stop overreacting, etc.  Haman also has to do reparations, such as building the Jewish people a new synagogue and/or paying for everyone’s B’nei Mitzvah parties.  According to 4-C, Haman also has to go to jail for several weeks, to make sure he’ll miss the date when he’d planned to harm the Jews.  It’s his last chance, as Mordecai, the Rabbi, and possibly a Jewish Red Panda are all keeping a very close eye on him.  But, now that Haman knows his plan was wrong, and now that he has no power to enact his worst impulses anymore, we think the Jews of Persia are safe and sound, without having to hang any kids or leave them fatherless. Shushan’s Jewish community is stronger than ever before.

A note for families: I think I may have broken the hearts of some of the students when I told them that Esther was probably not technically a real person.  I’d like to modify that a bit – families, could you please reinforce to children of all genders that, while Esther might not have been a literal person, there were totally women who were brave, lovely, and determined — indeed, I see them right here in class — we just don’t always know their names in history.  Likewise, even if Mordecai wasn’t technically a real fellow, there were people who were wise, and great listeners, who supported women, and who had other great skills to save the day — I see them, too!  Even if Haman wasn’t a real person (luckily for us), there were people in power who overreacted and made terrible choices (unluckily for us).  Basically, there were real people historically who behaved like all our Purim characters, and who had great adventures.  Similarly, there are real people currently who behave like our Purim characters; we can all be Brave Determined Esthers and Wise Supportive Mordecais!  Thank you for helping with that.  🙂

Here are some more cool conversation-openers to have with your children.

• For the justice-oriented child: We now know that people aren’t actually bad inside — not even Haman — but sometimes people make bad choices, and sometimes bad choices can cause lots of harm.  How can we fix the harm from a very bad choice (without hanging children, and without leaving Haman’s children without their dad)?  Should Haman help fix the damage he’s caused, or maybe can we not trust him to help out right now?  We know that Haman tends to overreact; how could the community prevent him from causing damage whenever he gets mad (such as by firing him, so he isn’t in a position of power anymore)?
• For the concrete-thinking child: What’re we doing for Purim?? Who will we dress up as? Oh boy!!
• For the heroic child: Think of an obstacle in your own familial life. How can we face that specific obstacle like Esther?  How can we face it like Mordecai?  (Basically, ‘What Would Esther Do?’)
• For the hilarious child: Some Purim celebrations feature expectations going upside-down and backwards, like an Opposite Day.  What would the world be like if the whole world did Purim this way, if we really had an Opposite Day?  (Kids would boss around their parents, mice would chase cats, rain would fall upwards…?)  Have fun!

Announcements:

• 3rd/4th Grade Family Havdalah Pool Party, 3/21, 3-5pm  We are excited to invite you to a 3rd & 4th Grade Family Havdalah Pool Party! The event will include a brief havdalah ceremony, free time to swim in the CBE pool, small crafts, and pizza dinner. This is a wonderful opportunity to connect with other Yachad families and we hope to see you all there!  Parents are encouraged to swim as well, and are required to be in the water with any children who cannot swim on their own. The event is $10 for adults and $8 for children. Siblings invited! Please RSVP here by Monday, March 16 to ensure we have enough lifeguards on duty.

• Purim at CBE!  We can’t wait to celebrate Purim with you! Check out all of our events at this link! We’re particularly looking forward to our Purim Carnival Sunday March 8th where there will be fun for all Yachad students!

• Passover Class for Parents/Caregivers, Saturday March 28, 11:30am, Room 303/304 in the Temple House. Want to feel like more of a Passover expert than you did last year? Join us on Saturday 3/28 from 11:30-12:20 for a class just for parents/caregivers that will leave you with new insights and activities to enrich your Passover seder! Please RSVP here for planning purposes.All welcome! This program is especially welcoming either partner in an interfaith relationship. This program is also for families with Jewish parents/caregivers that want to shine up their learning and Passover’s relevancy to their family today.

  Yachad student classes will happen as usual. The Lower School Family Program that runs weekly at this time will be combined with this special class.

• Yachad Passover Family Day, Saturday April 4th, 9:30-12:30. 

  Whose Freedom Do You Want To Be A Part Of Your Seder? 

  Following Gan Shabbat and Yachad time in the main Shabbat morning service, all K-6th grade Yachad families are invited for Passover Family Day! Come dive deeply into fun, hands on activities about Passover and liberation in our world today! Everyone will build their own Social Justice Haggadah to share new activities, recipes and questions at your seder this year!All K-6th grade Yachad families are invited to join no matter what day you are registered. K-4th grade students must be accompanied by a parent or responsible adult and 5th/6th grade parents are highly encouraged to attend.

  Hope to see you there!